Ten Days Meme

I saw this goin' around on DeviantART. At first, I kinda shrugged it off. Like I'm gonna keep up with this for ten days.


Then I decided, why not? Could be therapeutic, and Lord knows I need to do something of the like right now.


Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot(in no order whatsoever).
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession.

~~~
Day One:

Ten Things You Want To Say To Ten Different People Right Now

(CAUTION: Many of these may apply to more than one person. And that person could be you! No, not you, them! Over there! Yeah, you!)

1. You don't know how proud I am of you. I wish I knew how to express it better than I do, but every time I try you shirk it off. I know you're gonna do great things. It's gonna be rough, but you'll make it.

2. I'm sorry that I'm as unpredictable as I am, but thank you for putting up with me for all these years. You don't know how much it means to me that we're still best friends, and always will be. I know I can depend on you. I hope you know you can depend on me too.

3. I feel like we're drifting apart, and honestly, that's ok with me. I feel like there's so much more you could be doing for yourself, you're just too afraid to try. One day people aren't going to pity you anymore. I've stopped pitying you. It's time you got yourself off the floor. I know you can do it, now show me. Otherwise, I don't need this in my life. I'm not gonna be dragged down any more than I have been by your attitude. I'm tired of feeling controlled by you. No more. I'm done.

4. Sometimes I don't know how to act around you, so I put up a front. I keep things surfacy for a reason, because I'm afraid something might happen if I let my guard down for even a second. Also, I wish you'd make up your mind. Don't feel like you have to be in a relationship to be worth something. You're just hurting yourself that way. The right one will show up, maybe now's just not the right time. I think you still have a bit of growing up to do before you can get involved in something so big. But don't give up!

5. I'm sorry you had to put up with all that crap. I wish I had been there for you when it all went downhill, but now you have nowhere to go but up. You're better than him, and can DO better than him. Don't let this get you down; the fact that you're taking a step in helping yourself proves how strong you are, and you're only gonna get stronger. I know it. I love you so much!

6. Maybe you knew this already, but you have no idea how much I wish/wished I could be you. I don't ever remember you not being confident. And the way you speak out with that confidence often amazes me. No wonder everyone is drawn to you. Just be careful. You tend to attract the wrong attention, and that worries me. I don't want you to change or to forget about me because of your new friends.

7. I wish you wouldn't make fun of the things I love to do. I don't need that. I need you to believe in me. It hurts when I try to talk to you about art and horses and you become a sudden asshole about it. You don't know, but sometimes it makes me cry. Being laughed at doesn't make me toughen up. I can't believe you haven't seen that by now. I'm tired of thinking that I have to freaking solve world hunger to impress you with my interests and talents.

8. I'm still appalled at how you guys behaved. I wish I could have come through the phone and slapped the hell out of the both of you. There is no need for you guys to be talking like that and attacking us. What the hell have we EVER done to you? And then denying it, or say you had the right? Hell no you did/do not. But after all that, I still love you guys.

9. I'm still not over it. I wish you were here. I miss you so much it hurts. So much has happened and changed. I miss your encouragement. You're the only one who believed in me, and I need that right now.

10. I would never have admitted this to your face, but you have no idea how jealous I am of you. Every dream you ever had came true, while mine seem to be crumbling. But honestly, I'm glad we drifted apart. We had some good times, but I never felt like I could tell you anything. I couldn't even be proud of my own achievements without you getting an attitude. What kind of a friendship is that? But I am sorry that we never really said "good-bye". As jealous as I can be when I think about it, I could never wish ill-will towards your future. You did teach me something though: I see your attitude and personality in other people, and I think I have the experience to handle it.

~~~

Well, that about covers Day One. Even when I'm not talking to these people face-to-face I still have trouble talking! What the heck?! Oh well. Some of it was good, honestly.

And don't go asking "Was number 2 me?!" and whatnot. I'm not going to tell.