Beauty of God: Day 21 - More Learning Experiences

Today was fairly normal, really. Althought, I felt a lot more accomplished, because I was able to buy fabric to redo my curtains with. They finally match my room's color scheme, red and white.

But there were so many times today when I got super impatient and, well, bratty.

All these frustrations kept happening one after another. For instance, when sewing something, you put the outside pieces facing each other. That way, once you flip it inside-out, you don't see the seams.

This is an elementary piece of knowledge for seamstresses. In other words, sewing those curtains should have been a no-brainer.

But then I go and waste thread sewing parts of it that, once turned inside-out, are wrong, and then I have to unstitch everything and start over. Or I run out of bobbin thread, and when I try to refill the bobbin, the thread get's loose and caught up around the twirly-thingamajig that the bobbin sets on, and then I keep dropping the bobbin so that I have to rewind the threat around it 50 times.

If it wasn't one thing, it was ten.

Needless to say, sewing those curtains took way longer than they should have, and I was not happy. I just wanted them done so I could wash 'em and see 'em hung up.

There were a few times during the day that I prayed, asking God to give me some serious help.

In reality, I think He was laughing. Because deep down, I expected instant help. And I bet all the while He was saying, "If you want instant gratification, take more zoloft."

You know how if you ask God for patience, He's not gonna straight up give you patience, but give you opportunities to be patient?

Yeah, that was my whole day.

Maybe I didn't quite ask for the right thing. Maybe I should have said, "Give me the grace to not kill anyone today, or throw this sewing machine out the window."

I mean...I didn't do either of those things...but still.

No, He gave me plenty of chances to sit back, take a deep breath, realize this is not the end of the world, that these curtains would get done, nothing to freak out about.
Had my chance, muffed it.

I guess it's got me thinking, it's kinda nice to have a loving Father who gives us so many chances to redeem ourselves. And that He doesn't mind when we ask Him for help. I think He absolutely relishes honesty and reliance on Him. Doesn't mean He's going to give us instant-nothing-can-go-wrong pills. But He gives us a chance to grow in a legit way.

Now...to put this into practice, part II: dealings with my mother.

(Seriously, I really do love you, mom. I'm sorry I'm a brat, and that I snap at you all the time. I know you don't do the things you do to exasperate me, and you don't deserve such harsh treatment from a failure daughter like me. I can't promise that I'll never snap at you again, but I can say that I want to try to give you the benefit of the doubt. It's not fair that you should be treated the way I treat you, when you're doing absolutely nothing wrong. I hope you know that I've never hated you, even when I'm in a bad mood.)